


Show Me What I'm Looking For

by Steffx621



Category: Veronica Mars (TV), Veronica Mars - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, One Shot, Post-Season/Series 03, Veronica Mars Holiday Gift Exchange 2015
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 03:45:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5612719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Steffx621/pseuds/Steffx621
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Logan x Veronica / Holiday-ish one-shot. It's a few years after college, and they've both moved on with their lives separately —they haven't seen each other in years, but then something brings them back together and after that, there's just so much they can do to keep off each other's lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Show Me What I'm Looking For

**Author's Note:**

  * For [StarlightAfterAStorm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarlightAfterAStorm/gifts).



> This was written for Nicole aka Kiki aka Starlightafterastorm at Tumblr for the VERONICA MARS HOLIDAY GIFT EXCHANGE 2015 :)

* * *

 

**_Show Me What I'm Looking For_ **

* * *

 

In a few short words, Elene Ruiz’ job was to bring people together. She’d been working in the Southern California Area for about fifteen years now, doing just that. When she and Veronica first met, Veronica had to sit through what felt like half a day of Elene telling her _all about_ the thousands and thousands of couples she had helped meet and get together through the years.

Of course it was bound that in over fifteen years of matchmaking as a career, she would end up with a weirdo stalker kind of guy a little too hard to get rid of, no?

Which was actually why Veronica met Elene in the first place. Elene was in over her head; on the one hand trying to keep her clients happy and safe, but on the other, _herself_ too.

She came to Veronica for help; since she had nothing on this guy worth a trip to the police station yet, but she figured it was better safe than sorry.

She told Veronica she either needed something to go to the police with, _or_ for her to just get the guy off her back.

Veronica had settled for the latter. Turned out Elene had ran into a perpetually single middle age guy who, while very much intense and insisting, hadn’t turned out to be as dangerous as Elene feared he was. Veronica watched him closely for about a week or so, followed him, and learned enough of him to formulate a few low-key threats for him, as well as a few incriminating pictures that would be sure to get Carlo Pizzo out off Elene’s hair.

And sure enough, now it was less than a month since their first visit, and Elene was back at Mars Investigations finalizing her case with Veronica.

She’d been talking so much Veronica wasn’t one hundred percent sure she was listening anymore though. Veronica had been trying to be as polite as she could, smiling, and nodding a lot, but seriously, couldn’t Elene just sign the dang papers already so she could go home?

Maybe?

Veronica sighed then at the fourth attempt of Elene’s to get her to talk about her own personal life. _Not gonna happen lady_ , Veronica thought, but of course Elene did not give up at all at her polite smile and shake of her head.

“Tell me now sweets, when was the last time you formally dated a man?”

Veronica just about gave in and laughed, but the serious look on Elene’s face prevented her from doing so. She bit the inside of her cheek instead.

“Listen honey, I work with a lot of women just like you, you know?”

Veronica raised a brow at that but didn’t reply for a beat.

Formally date? A _man?_ Yeah, well, sure it had been a while. It wasn’t as if she was lacking suitors of course, but a real relationship per se wasn’t exactly her strongest suit these days.

She’d been in relationships —sort of…not really, but she’d dated a bit —although…maybe not really. More like she’d been on a few first dates in the last few months. That kind of summed it up and even Veronica knew that was kind of sad for a twenty something year old like her.

“I think you are one of those,” Elene said after a moment bringing Veronica back from her musings.

She still couldn’t help narrowing her eyes. “One of _those_?”

“Yes darling,” Elene replied as charmingly as ever. “You are young, and beautiful, successful enough and quite smart, yet you aren’t all that successful in the love department, are ya sweetheart?”

Veronica snorted and sort of really wanted to tell this lady to stop right that second with that thought, but even she knew being rude and shutting her up wouldn’t be exactly good for business.

She sighed yet again in the end. “You got me, Elene,” Veronica answered at last, forcing herself not to roll her eyes. “What about we sign these papers so we can be done for the day —it’s getting late,”

“Wait, wait, you just said I was right…you gotta at least hear me out now,” Elene insisted and now Veronica didn’t only want to shut her up, she maybe also wanted to punch her in the face.

She caved in the end though because it was late, and she was tired, and maybe if Elene could get whatever it was she had to say out of her system already, they could both go home soon.

“I wanna offer you my services?”

Wait, what? “What?” Veronica was confused and it translated in the almost shrill sound that came from her almost immediately at Elene’s words. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Honey,” Elene said then rather condescendingly, and Veronica couldn’t help glaring. Elene backed up a little and decided to start again. “Veronica,” She settled saying, and grinned. “I’ve been doing this for a long long time,”

“As you’ve told me,” A couple billion times, Veronica thought, but didn’t finish her thought aloud.

“Yes,” Elene agreed. “Let me do this for you,” She quickly added. “As a courtesy for helping my business when I needed most — _during the holiday season no less_ —let me offer you my services —for free…?”

At that, Veronica immediately got up from her seat and began shaking her head and hands in front of her. “Nope Elene, not going to happen, you don’t have to worry. I was just doing my job,”

“And I’m asking you to let me do _my_ job —as a gift, please?” Elene said easily, calm as ever, still seating on the seat opposite to Veronica’s.

Veronica in any case, couldn’t help shaking her head. “It’s not necessary,”

“I know, but I…I insist…”

“Elene,”

“Just give me a chance, I’m _very_ good at my job…let me show you,”

Veronica was still so not sure —she wanted to tell Elene to just go home and leave her alone, but…

“A date — _two tops_ , if you hate it…you can hate _me_ after that, I swear never to bother you about this again, _and_ , I’ll even pay double next time I need _your_ services,”

Veronica sighed deeply — _considering_ Elene’s words.

It was a win, and Elene knew it —she smiled slightly. “You’ll have to work with me —I ask, an afternoon to get a better feel of the real you, and after that you can let _me_ do all the work. I promise,”

Veronica rolled her eyes. “ _One date_ , that’s all you get,” And truthfully the only reason she was not kicking Elene on her front tail was because maybe Veronica was indeed a little more love sick than she cared to admit.

Elene gave her a look then. “You are not going to regret it, trust me.”

x

Oh but Veronica regretted it all right…

So much she felt like screaming right that moment. She knew Elene had been pushing it when she asked her to agree to a darn blind date, but Veronica had been swamped with work at the time, and just to get her out of her hair she’d told Elene yes to everything so long as she stopped calling her office every fifteen minutes.

Oh how much Veronica wished she’d taken two minutes, _two sad minutes_ to talk to her about this stupid date.

Of all people that could be standing before her, it had to be _him…him?_

Oh universe, you stupid grand bitch. Veronica should have asked more questions about this guy, she should have…but _wait_ , — _he_ lied though! She was supposed to meet _Alan Roderick_ or something, not fucking Logan Echolls! She even ran a stupid background search on Alan-whatever earlier; the guy did exist and had an impeccable record —that was why Veronica begrudgingly came, because her stupid date seemed decent, she didn’t come to see…well, _Logan_ …

When she saw _him_ standing there in the very same spot she was supposed to meet her so-called date this evening, she froze.

Veronica couldn’t emove right now, so she decided to instead take a second look, then a third look as he actually started walking in her direction, and then suddenly she couldn’t take it any longer, and turned around from him.

She shut her eyes and started murmuring things to herself about just what the hell she was doing here to begin with.

She felt Logan directly behind her at some point, but she still couldn’t turn around.

“It’s been a while,” He said after a beat, and she truthfully wanted nothing more but for the earth to open up and swallow her.

“Please tell me you are here to meet your girlfriend or your wife, and I’m just stupidly making a fool out of myself thinking you are here because of why I think you are here,”

She was rambling, and while it probably shouldn’t, it made Logan smile. “It’s nice to see you too, Veronica,”

She groaned quietly enough, bringing her hands up to her face. “I’m so embarrassed.”

“Why, don’t say,” He casually said then, and _finally_ at that Veronica turned and their eyes meet. “You are blushing,” He noted easily, and there was the very same sweet smile of his she remembered so well.

It pained her a little because it had been so long, _too long_ since she had seen it, but she smiled too. She had to. “Hey,”

“Hi there,” He said back, but this time his voice came softer. “Look, I’m sorry about this,” It truthfully wasn’t his fault, but this was Veronica Mars, so he knew he needed to apologize anyway, right? “I had no idea it was going to be you, Veronica. I…” He paused, and there was that little smile of his again.

Veronica was sure her knees were going to fail her any time, but then he spoke again, and she was out of whatever Logan induced trance she’d let herself fall in.

“It was nice seeing you,” He stated, and then she could almost see the way his body was angling to turn from her.

“Logan,” She called then, more so out of sheer instinct than anything else. It felt so strange to say his name aloud, but…it wasn’t a bad weird at all. She reached out to touch his arm without thinking much more.

Logan looked startled a little by the touch at first, she could tell, and yet Veronica still refused to move her hand away from him. When their eyes met then, she made herself smile at him again. “It _is_ nice seeing you too,” She stressed that because she really felt she had to —for some reason she knew _he_ needed to hear it, so there, she said it. “You aren’t going to make me drive back home hungry, are you now?”

And before the words were completely out of her, he was shaking his head. Of course he was not going to do that. “No,” He answered quickly. “I wouldn’t dream of such a thing,” He added, and it made her smile, if only a little bit wider.

“You made a reservation, right?” As Veronica asked him this, both of them began in the direction of the restaurant.

Logan was efficient and charming then getting them their table. He was friendly, and open to the hostess yet not too much that it would be inappropriate. Veronica found herself mostly quiet as they walked to the table —she wasn’t expecting to find Logan here. _Never_. Not in a million years. All of her current brain cells were at that moment trying to just process _Logan_ —he looked very much the same, but at the same time not at all. He had grown; boy, he had, but age had done him well — she thought so anyway. He was dressed very casual, dark jeans, and a dark dress shirt. She felt a little overdressed herself in the dress and heels she decided to wear, and truthfully, it would have made her a lot more uncomfortable if the person sitting in front of her hadn’t turned out to be Logan of all people.

Oh the irony.

Which brought her back to the same thought yet again…Logan.

_Logan_.

They hadn’t seen each other in a few years, yet she knew he wasn’t going to have any problems seeing right through her if he tried even just a little.

“A penny for your thoughts…”

They were alone again. She barely remembered asking the hostess for water and hearing Logan requesting the same thing. Now said hostess was gone, and Veronica was finally alone again with the very boy she wished weren’t making her stomach feel like a congregation of butterflies.

Eventually, Veronica smiled tightly looking over at him while shaking her head. “What the heck are _you_ doing here?” Her question had no edge —no bite, not at all. She was smiling easier now, and honestly, almost laughing at the absurdity of the situation.

Of all the people in the world, of all the possible men Veronica could have been _matched_ with, it _had_ to be _Logan_ she got to meet with today, huh? It was surreal —to say the least.

“I’ll answer if you promise to answer the same question back,”

She shrugged at that because what the freaking hell. “I was working with Elene. A case. I…I helped her,” She said. “She insisted to set me up,”

“And you said yes?”

The question made her let out a laugh, and her eyes went wide. “Have you _met_ Elene? She basically blackmailed me _and_ then kidnapped me to make sure I’d show up…”

Logan chuckled at that because it was such a valid response —he _did know_ Elene. “Sounds legit,”

In that moment of course their waters came, and Veronica stared blank at the waitress when she realized she hadn’t even looked at the menu.

“A few more minutes?” Charming as ever Logan chimed in then, and with just a barely-there-nod, Veronica too smiled in the direction of the waitress as she left their table.

“You haven’t answered the question?” She asked him then quickly, looking at Logan strongly instead of dwelling in just how surprised and truthfully, _shocked_ to see him she still was.

Logan in any case looked rather relaxed and maybe even _happy_ to be there with her which was confusing to her, but Veronica had no time for that right now.

Neither did Logan honestly. Right now _she_ was here, and _that_ mattered. “My partner at work, he…I lost a bet. He _made_ me do it,”

Carefully Veronica processed his answer; she tilted her head and gave him a half smirk. “So this isn’t something you, you know, _do_?”

“Well, right now it is,” He replied with a smirk knowing exactly what her train of thought had been. “But no, Ronnie, this isn’t something I’ve done a lot —I still have some game, you know?”

And of course that made her snort and then laugh — _really_ laugh for the first time since they got there, and that alone made Logan equal parts happy to be here, but also sad it had taken them so long to get their act together and meet.

He let out a long contained breath then and after fixing her with a silly look and easy smile, he picked up the menu from the table and allowed his eyes to scan the different options. The restaurant was nice enough for LA standards, yet not too fancy that it would make Veronica completely uncomfortable, so Logan was glad he’d chosen it. He hadn’t been here in quite a while, so it was nice one way or the other at least she was going to leave this ‘meeting’ with a nice warm belly filled with some of her favorite food.

They hadn’t _seen_ each other since the end of the summer after their freshman year at Hearts. Logan left town shortly before the beginning of the school year —shortly after Veronica came back from her internship in Virginia —shortly after she pretty much _demanded_ he left. Not for him, she assured him, but because _she_ didn’t want to have to see him dead at 20.

She’d been serious, she’d been _scared,_ she’d been sure he was going to end up dead sometime soon because of a stupid cafeteria fight he got into _because of her._

So he left, and Veronica stayed home. She dealt with the fallout of almost everything and kind of hated herself for a long time afterwards.

Eventually she went back to Private Investigating with her father.

Eventually things started to look up a little again.

Logan moved around for a bit after leaving Neptune. School suddenly didn’t seem so important so he didn’t bother.

Eventually he decided wasting his life was, well, a waste, so he stopped.

Eventually things also started to look up a bit.

He never went far, deciding LA from all the hellholes in the world would be his new ‘home’

They both thought about contacting the other sometimes —they didn’t. Not at first anyway.

They emailed a few times throughout the years; mostly on special occasions. When Veronica graduated, she got an email from him. When Logan graduated a year later, _he_ got an email as well.

They never talked about how both of them always kept tabs on each other over the years —yet they both did.

About a year ago Veronica had been in LA on a case and called him — _actually called him_ —against her better judgement.

Logan however happened to _not be_ in LA during that particular weekend. They talked about maybe getting together sometime when he went to visit Neptune — _he wasn’t going to any time soon_ — or when she came back to LA — _she wasn’t going to any time soon either_. They didn’t actually speak again after that call.

Not until this fine evening that was.

“You write books now, huh?”

He shrugged. “Sometimes,”

And that made her smile. “I’ve never read them,”

“No?” His eyebrows shot up —interest effectively piqued.

She smiled back but couldn’t meet his eye. “Nope.”

“You big liar, Veronica,”

“I haven’t really,”

“ _But_?”

At this, she looked up. She was smirking a little, and the curiosity was pouring out of him. “Dad has,” And then the answer came as easy and light as ever.

Logan tried to keep his cool, but barely could. His eyes were wider than before, and Veronica felt like grinning at that. “What?”

“My father, ‘member him?” She asked carrying sickly sweet. “That timetraveling book, it was on his counter once, I saw it,”

Logan eyes narrowed a little. “Does he know it’s me?”

Veronica bit her lip, and nodded at the question. Logan’s eyes shifted from hers, and she couldn’t help but squishing her face apologetically. This was the first time she was questioning whether bringing this up had been a good idea or not. “He didn’t know at first it was you, but I kinda…I might’ve blurted out…”

He looked back at her at that —and glared. “How?”

Innocently, Veronica shrugged. “I couldn’t help it, I saw the book, and kind of just asked him why he had _your_ book in his house…” Logan’s eyes slightly softened. “I’m sorry,” She offered then sheepishly. “But it’s not like it is a secret, right?”

“Nope…not really,”

“So you are not mad?” At the question, Logan simply shook his head. “I still didn’t read it,”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.” She answered, and for a little bit, they became quiet. “Would you have wanted me to?”

“What? Read the book?”

“Yeah,”

He shrugged flippantly. “Yes, no, if you wanted to,”

They stopped talking about the subject then as Veronica looked down at her plate and started sort of eating some of her pasta. It was not really that good, a little too crispy for her taste, and yet…eating that seemed much better than actually looking at Logan right now. Of course she wanted and had wanted to read his book forever.

_Of course._

She’d stopped herself from doing it time and time again for really no apparent reason other than she really didn’t know if _Logan_ wanted her to read them or not.

Now she knew though.

The book her father had, the one about the timetraveler was one of three she knew he’d written under a sappy pseudonym. It was the one she’d heard more about, and while she hadn’t read it, not even one page, she knew the words on the cover by heart

‘ _Sometimes a moment is missed and the story ends. Sometimes a moment’s missed and you go back and do it over. Sometimes you get it right.”_

“Are you gonna read them now?”

Veronica was smiling playfully when her eyes shifted up to meet his. “I don’t know…maybe, who knows…”

He knew she was teasing him, trying to get under his skin, and while it was definitely working, she didn’t need to know that.

“Well, ya let me know when you do… _if you do_ …”

The way he spoke was so easy and cool, as if he didn’t care if she did or not, but…he did care, and she knew it. After meeting his eyes, she went for a smirk. “We’ll see,” She said before shoving a fork-full of food in her mouth instead of smiling as terribly as she wanted.

After that, the conversation shifted into more casual catching up —Veronica was glad to hear his life came together somehow, and he seemed genuinely interested to hear what she had been up to these last few years.

They were done with dinner now, but…she wasn’t quite ready to say goodbye. She didn’t think Logan was either, so right that minute she decided to take a bit of a chance. “I haven’t bought my dad one of his presents yet,” Logan looked at her curiously when she spoke —it was four days until Christmas; the Veronica he remembered would have never waited that long to get her father of all people his present. “Relax,” She called when she could almost see the wheels in his mind turning. “His main present has been stashed in my closet for months now,” Now that was the Veronica he remembered. “I figured since I was coming to LA, I could stop by Teuscher chocolate and get him something,” She shrugged.

His eyebrows knitted a little, and she could tell he was thinking something. She reached over and flicked his hand making him look up at her. “I thought this… _date_ ,” She almost spat the word out. “Would be…let’s say a lot less pleasant than it turned out,”

“Wait, did you just pay me a compliment?”

She shook her head at that unimpressed. “Once an ass, always an ass, huh?”

“You know it,”

_Oh he was, but she’d missed him. She’d missed that idiot so damn much it was almost making her chest ache. She wanted to tell him too,_ _which was odd, she thought, but she did_. She wanted to say the words so badly, and yet she couldn’t quite dare to do it. “Do you wanna come with?”

“Excuse me?”

“To Teuscher —the chocolate shop,” Veronica offered. “Unless like me, you figured this would be hell and already have plans for the rest of your evening…”

“I don’t,”

“Did you think it was going to go well?”

“Not really,”

“So?”

“So nothing Veronica —I just didn’t come with a game plan,”

She snorted at that. “As if,” She said with a laugh. “You are Logan Echolls. Do I need to remind you that?”

He rolled his eyes but there was also a smile on his face. “Do you wanna walk there?”

“Yeah,” Her reply came quiet now and she was just barely meeting his eyes. “That sounds nice,”

x

They walked; they walked and walked for a bit longer than they had to. It felt nice to catch up, to just talk to him and joke around because why the hell not. It wasn’t until Logan caught Veronica squinting at street names that he chuckled and assured her he’d bring her back safe and sound to the exact place she’d parked her car earlier.

She’d smirked and tried to play cool, but he’d seen right through her, which while she’d never admit to him, was nice in a way. It was nice someone other than her father looked at her like he knew her… _really_ knew her.

They both chose an assortment of chocolates for her father and tried a few dozen in the store. There was giggling and teasing and they both cared to look a little ashamed when an elderly customer looked at them oddly when Veronica almost shoved a chocolate truffle inside Logan’s mouth.

Upon leaving the store they were quiet…mostly. Logan called someone about his car, and Veronica looked at him oddly when he started giving whoever it was on the phone, directions to their location.

“Don’t look at me like that!” He called, and she put her hands up defensive, although she was most certainly _still_ looking at him _like that._ “It’s not like he’s my chauffer or anything,”

“No?”

“No!” Logan shook his head strongly. “It’s the company’s car service…I’m using it. I work there, I get to,” He said casually, but she was having a hard time not laughing.

She was looking ahead trying not to bump into anyone as they walked, but out of the corner of his eye Logan could tell the half smile she wasn’t quite smiling.

“Hey,” He called after a beat, and she just looked at him. “I never did say, but…you look beautiful Veronica,”

“Thanks,” She said carefully. It took her aback, for some reason, and she wanted to say something more back to that, but by the time she shifted her eyes to his properly, he’d moved on already from that comment.

She smiled anyway and simply nodded as he began telling her yet another story about some weirdo he met once while on a business trip.

x

It was six days after New Year’s and Veronica just couldn’t get out of bed. She wondered where exactly she caught whatever bug she had, but kept coming blank. It was so awful though; she felt awful. She wasn’t sure if it was the flu, or a terribly strong cold or what, but this morning she woke up with the worst headache she’d had in years.

Her nose was also runny, her throat felt awfully sore, and every time she coughed she felt as if someone was hitting her on the chest with a hot hot hammer.

It was barely noon now and Veronica had barely been able to get herself to and from the bathroom the couple of times she’d needed to use it.

Eventually she started feeling too hot in bed though —almost suffocating. She felt sticky and hot, but couldn’t dream of showering right now so she settled for getting some water. She padded her way in the direction of her small kitchen slowly but then she heard it —someone was knocking on her door.

She wondered quickly if whoever was there had been knocking for a long time and she just hadn’t heard it.

In any case she hoped it was her father —or Wallace, or someone she could bitch and moan about how miserable she felt right then.

But of course when she swung her door open it was not her father in front of her —nope, not even Wallace or even her curious new neighbor who kept bringing her not-too-tasty muffins every so often. Nope. None of that. Of course the one to knock on her door had to be Logan Echolls of all people in the world.

Veronica was suddenly panicked, embarrassed, pissed, and hell, even a little happy all at the same fucking time.

The first thing that escaped her was a groan though and she shook her head at him. “Oh God, what are you doing here?”

Logan ignored that question because it took him three seconds flat to take her in and she did _not_ look well. “You look awful,”

“Thank you,” She spat angrily, marching back into her apartment. “I hate you so much right now,”

“Me? Why me? What did I do?” He asked back but he really didn’t care about the answer. Honestly, all Logan cared in that moment was how very _awful_ Veronica truthfully did look.

“Because you are here, and I’m sick, and looking deadly and you just…showed up?”

He nodded because he really didn’t know what else to tell her. “I called your office this morning —your father, um, Keith, he said you hadn’t come in today. Said I could find you at home,”

“And so you just came?”

He shrugged

At that, Veronica shook her head glaring at him, and then hopped on her couch pulling her knees up as far as they could go. She closed her eyes for all of twenty seconds before blinking and finding Logan still standing before her not saying a thing.

She scowled at him now. “You never called,”

Logan’s eyebrows knitted in confusion and he shook his head at her. “Veronica I just told you I call—”

“No, you called the office, you didn’t call _me,_ ” And now she was just being childish but she didn’t care —she was sick and while she wasn’t sure if she had any right to or not, she was pissed he hadn’t called before.

“I didn’t…” Logan said, but paused, letting out a breath. “I wasn’t sure you wanted me to,”

And of course those words made her roll her eyes so much and groan. “I gave you my number!”

He shrugged —again, not sure what to tell her really. The truth was that he had been pretty much terrified to call first. Which was stupid. In just about every single level that could exist. And yet Logan had decided better not to call her…too soon. He waited a few days after their ‘date’, but then it was Christmas and he figured she was going to be too busy so he waited some more. Then it was New Year’s and more days after that, and then Logan started wondering if maybe he’d waited too long to call and stalled calling some more.

But then he found her necklace in his car and he figured he might as well call now that he had a semi-valid excuse to do so.

He thought wrong obviously.

“Look Veronica, I’m sorry, you are clearly not feeling well, so just — _nothing_ , I’m sorry,” He said, and then moved further into the apartment stretching out his arm. “Here’s your necklace, you left it in the car the other day,”

Veronica blinked at that and suddenly felt so stupid she could barely stand it. He handed her a small Ziploc bag with…yes, the necklace she’d been wearing that day they’ve met in LA.

She looked up at him ready to say something —not sure what yet, but something, but then before she could speak though, Logan did it first. “Feel better soon, kay?” He mumbled as he leaned in and without thinking too much, he kissed her forehead. “I’ll see ya,”

And just like that he was turning around from her and walking to the door. He closed it behind him before Veronica could as much as put one more word in.

Great, she was the biggest asshole in the history of assholes. Way to go Veronica. Way to freaking go.

x

Forty five minutes later she was still on her couch —sulking mostly, but also blowing her nose and coughing every so often too.

Someone was at her door again, but this time she didn’t get up to open it —not right away anyway.

She was pissed at herself right now, and still feeling all shades of nasty, so no, she wasn’t up to any more ill visits this day.

But then…then she heard him. _Him._

Again.

“I can see your minute self from here, you know?”

And it was Logan, and while she was suddenly equal parts shocked and glad he was here, she didn’t dwell and instead rose to her feet quickly and opened the freaking door already. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry about…before,” She rushed to say but Logan didn’t pay her much attention.

He walked right into the apartment, and Veronica couldn’t ignore the paper bags he was holding.

“What’re you doing?”

At that he actually turned and looked over at her. “You are sick Veronica,” He said and it was so simple and yet so sweet that Veronica actually wanted to hug him but of course she didn’t.

She instead stared over at him for a little more than she should have, before simply nodding. She felt like a ginormous bitch even more so now for snapping at him earlier, but at the same time she was just so glad he came back she almost forgot how much she hated herself. Instead she decided to go and close her door, and then watched as Logan got everything from cold and flu medicine, to soup containers and take out boxes on top of her dining table.

He even bought her her favorite Ben’s and Jerry’s flavor —the very same one she’d loved since she was a kid, and in that moment she was reminded of just about every single moment she’d lived with that boy.

All the crappy ones, and all the good ones. The sad ones, and the happiest ones. _He was her friend_. Before anything and everything, Logan Echolls was one of her oldest best friends, and maybe it was just the fever she was sure was spiking, but maybe it was not, and maybe she was just really _really_ happy he was here.

x

The rest of the day was a lot less miserable than Veronica had expected it to be. Logan forced her to eat that soup he got her before he let her have any of her ice-cream, but eventually he did, and eventually the medicine he brought actually started to kick in and at least the headache was gone by now.

She asked him to watch a movie and Logan agreed without much fuss —she knew he just wanted to keep an eye on her, and while she knew it annoyed her at some level, it wasn’t nearly enough for her to actually say something.

Instead they watched a movie, then another —Logan put it this time; mechanically, and again Veronica didn’t say anything. They were fifteen minutes into the second movie when Veronica felt her head bopping every so often and her eyes fighting to stay open. She was curled up beside him, she was touching the side of his leg slightly with her knees but there was still a lot of couch space between them.

It was when she remembered that kiss to her forehead he gave her before he left the first time, that she decided she didn’t care if she was actually a little bit closer to him.

Or maybe even a little more than a little bit closer.

She was blinking heavily as she shifted from her position and scooched closer to Logan on the couch. He was actually focused watching the film, so it took him a little by surprise when Veronica curled up against his side.

She was not saying anything, so neither did he.

She nuzzled sleepily against his side trying to get comfortable but it was when Logan moved his arm to wrap around her waist that she finally felt completely at ease for once.

He ran his fingers up and down the length of her back slowly, keeping his eyes on her television screen. She looked up at him briefly —too briefly really, but then she smiled and snuggled back down against his arm.

She didn’t give two cents about the movie, so she closed her eyes and breathed deeply as she fell asleep. She still felt ill, she still couldn’t fucking stop her nose from running or her throat from aching, but at least now she didn’t feel lonely.

x

“Let’s get you to bed,”

“No,” She mumbled back, shaking her head. “You are gonna go,”

“It’s late,”

She actually looked at him as he said that. Her eyes were innocent and misty and he wanted to fucking kiss her right then but he couldn’t let himself go there. At all. He couldn’t, because none of _right now_ felt right —although it did. But it couldn’t, right? They hadn’t seen — _really_ seen each other in so long, and she was sick, and the last thing Logan was sure she wanted was for him to give in to whatever feelings or not-feelings for her he was feeling right now.

He didn’t even know.

So instead of doing anything, saying anything at all that he really meant, he smiled and tenderly ran the pad of his thumb over those precious lines of her face. “I’ll call you tomorrow?”

She was disappointed to hear that, he could tell, but at the same time he was not sure what to do about it, so he stayed quiet.

Eventually, she nodded. “Yeah,” She said softly, and then let him help her get up. She was sleepy, but also weak from whatever stupid bug she still had in her system. “My phone, not Dad,”

“Your phone,” He agreed, and their eyes met. He was smiling, slightly, but smiling —she was not.

She looked sad but then she was looking away from him before he could say anything.

Logan sighed but kept quiet. She went to the bathroom adjacent to her bedroom and he waited by her bed. It was a weird feeling —having _him_ taking care of her. It was not the first time, she knew; honestly, he was one of the few who’d showed up for her whenever she’d really needed someone.

She shouldn’t have been surprised when he came back earlier that day. He was Logan after all. Still _her_ Logan, the one she remembered and made herself not think about too often. He was still Logan and she didn’t care one bit about patronizing tone he used when he reminded her then to take her medicines in the morning.

Instead she smiled weakly at him and offered a nod. She was all tucked in bed, and he was hovering above her. He was not really smiling anymore, but his lips were turned into a slight thin line. He breathed out slowly, before, for the second time that day, leaning down and kissing her forehead. “Bye now Ronnie,”

“Bye,” She said back and it was a whisper and she was not sure if he heard her or not before he stepped out of her room.

She found herself swallowing hard, and fighting the urge to go after him. She didn’t want him to go —not really, but…she really didn’t have any right to ask him to stay either.

She closed her eyes then, instead of letting her mind go there. Today was good, so it was better to just enjoy it for what it was, instead of thinking about what it wasn’t…

x

It was 3am and something woke her. She was not too sure what was it, but she was awake, and the clock beside her bed told her it was still too early to be waking up. Her throat felt so dry though and she’d already drank all the water in the glass on her bedside table. She considered whether to get up or not for a few moments, enough to see if she could go right back to sleep, but when that failed to happen, Veronica chose to just get up and get fresh water.

She was halfway to the kitchen when her eyes trailed to her couch and she smiled —more so grinned honestly. She hadn’t heard her door closing earlier, but she figured Logan had just been quiet. But he was still here, for some reason, and she was glad he was.

She did go to the kitchen then, got herself some water quietly, and then went back to her bedroom. She grabbed her comforter and then padded her way back to the living room. Her couch was just barely big enough for the two of them, but she didn’t seem to care. Logan didn’t wake up completely, just stirred a bit in his sleep. Veronica set beside him, and used the comforter to cover them both up. Logan readjusted sleepily, one arm wrapping instinctively around her frame and his chin moving to the space between her shoulder and neck. She was fast asleep almost immediately.

When she woke up again, not sure how long after crashing with Logan on the couch, she turned to find him staring at her. “You are here,” He mumbled, and she knew, she just knew he hadn’t been awake for too too long.

It made her smile even if inwardly she was already re-thinking her decision to set beside him last night. “ _You_ are here,” She pointed out instead, and Logan then had the decency to look down and look coy. Her smile grew at that.

“It’s creepy, I know,” He admitted and Veronica couldn’t help nodding. “But,” He added, and suddenly he was serious. “When I said goodnight —you were burning up Ronnie,” He informed her and it took Veronica a little by surprise. “I didn’t want to leave in case you needed something,”

She wanted to tell him that it _was_ a little creepy —a lot really, but she didn’t. Words didn’t quite form for a while, enough for Logan to use one of his hands to brush the hair out of her face. It took her another moment then, but eventually she smiled again, and even met his eyes. “Thank you,” She said and of course he looked away.

It dawned on her then that they were still on her couch —limbs tangled with one another and faces mere inches from each other. She knew she should move —she should _want_ to move at least right?

But she didn’t want to. Instead she made him look up at her again with her hands. “For everything —thank you for everything.” She added and without thinking leaned in and kissed his cheek —and fine, it was not so much his cheek but the side of his mouth, but it was still _not_ his mouth mouth and she took some comfort in that. _Talk about self-control_.

After a few seconds, she looked back up at his still shaken expression but decided not to push on anything —instead she snuggled closer to his side again and mumbled into his chest how she was still not nearly healthy enough for actual conversations right now.

Logan didn’t push it either. He just watched her and held her to him if only a little tighter.

If only he’d had at least a _little_ bit of a say in Veronica Mars marching into his life this way and turning everything upside down again.

If only.

God, he was screwed.

x

Logan had been having a particular stressful morning that with his regular work load and that of one of his coworkers who decided leaving for more than two weeks’ vacation just because, was acceptable and Logan wouldn’t mind at all dealing with the stupidly irritating clients he worked with.

Still, he’d worked through most of the hard phone calls now so at least there was that.

Logan was just about to text Alan — _the partner at work_ — about getting out of there for lunch or something, when his cell started buzzing.

He picked up the phone and stayed quiet as her voice traveled to his ears. “Hey, it’s me,”

“Hi,” He said back quietly, yet sure the surprise in his voice hadn’t gone unnoticed.

They stayed quiet for a few moments, not too much that either thought the connection had failed but enough to give them both time to process they were talking to one another. They texted a bit since that day a week ago when she was sick, but that was the extent of it.

This was the first time they were actually talking.

“So…I’m downstairs,”

Wait, what? “Downstairs?”

“Yup,” The answer came quickly and easy —suddenly Veronica was not nearly as nervous as she thought she was. “Downstairs as in standing by the humongous water fountain in front of your office building,”

“Oh,” He replied and it was weak, but it still made her smile.

“I saw a Starbucks on my way here, do you have a minute? You wanna maybe—”

“Yeah sure,” He answered quickly and Veronica was almost one hundred percent sure he was already rushing from his seat and heading to the door.

Again she smiled, and then just heard him saying something to someone —a secretary or an intern she assumed.

“Yeah, I’ll be back by then,” He huffed, and Veronica could almost hear the roll of his eyes.

She really didn’t come to catch some coffee with him —she kind of knew that he knew that too, but it seemed important before to her to have something to do with him before she asked him to drop everything in the middle of a work day for her just because.

It was about five minutes later when Veronica spotted Logan walking out through some glass doors. He looked sharp in his work suit, but more so, she thought, grown up. She smiled at that when their eyes met in the distance. He was smirking playfully at her, and she knew a joke or a jibe was on the tip of his tongue.

Before Logan had a chance to speak though, Veronica was in front of him, and her tiny arms were reaching up to wrap around his neck. He was taken aback —that was for sure, but he still gave a low laugh as his arms too reach to wrap around her considerably smaller frame.

It took her a moment to push back from him and look up, but when she did, she was grinning. “I wanted to say thank you,” Her voice was coy, and her face uncertain yet she knew she had to say this now, otherwise she was going to explode. “Last week, you showing up, it…it meant a lot, so um, thanks…Logan, thank you,” She stumbled over her words, but they felt so warm as Logan heard them he couldn’t help but smile back at her.

“If we forgo the fact that you just said _thank you_ to _me —and,_ hugged _me_ ,  I would dare say you are looking and are probably feeling a lot more like yourself now, Mars…”

His words had no bite to them whatsoever, yet Veronica still rolled her eyes and lightly punched his arm. “Don’t be a jackass,”

He shrugged slightly, and then looked down shuffling his feet for a moment. He was taking in a deep breath when he looked back at her. “We are not strangers Veronica,” He said, and she was suddenly serious and fervently listening to whatever he was going to tell her. “It was nothing,”

She was not really surprised by his words, no, not really, but that didn’t mean it moved her any less. She tilted her head and half smiled. “What are we then? Friends? _Buddies_?”

He smiled, but didn’t meet her eyes. “ _Something_ ,” He muttered after a beat, and then looked over at her —it was imperative he changed the subject now. “You wanna tell me why you really came?”

She felt genuinely shocked, and maybe even a little insulted at those words; her jaw dropped almost to the floor, but Logan began laughing at her before she could start defending herself.

“As if I didn’t know ya,” He argued easily then, and he was grinning now, and Veronica was finding it very very hard to hate him right then.

She gritted her teeth in a stupid attempt not to match his grin. “I’ll let you know my whole purpose for coming to your office was to offer my thank you’s,” She insisted childishly. “Thank you very much,” She added, and even crossed her arms over her chest.

Logan was looking amused, but not even if she tried Veronica could mind. He sighed theatrically, and shook his head at her. “You need a favor, is that it?” He asked, but Veronica didn’t answer for a moment.

He was enjoying this too much to want it to stop, so instead Logan used an arm to wrap around her waist and looking down at her eyes with a ginormous grin, he started walking with her down the street.

They were quiet, for at least a couple of minutes. For some reason the streets weren’t all that crowned yet, so that was nice. They walked beside each other, stealing glances every once in a while until Logan spoke casually. “You don’t really want Starbucks coffee, do you?”

At that, Veronica shook her head playfully and he smirked. “I like this local bakery down here by 4th and Broadway…do you wanna go?” He asked, and of course she nodded her head —yes her main and most important purpose of this day trip to LA had been to say thank you to Logan personally, but…

Yeah, okay, she kind of did need a favor —maybe, she wasn’t even sure, she thought maybe Logan could help her if this visit didn’t backfire on her, and since so far it hadn’t….

Well…

“I do have a favor to ask you,” Veronica said eventually. They’d already made it to the bakery and she found it she loved it. It was pretty hidden away, but it was cozy, smelled like the heavens, and everything on display looked to die for. Logan ordered some kind of muffin or something, while Veronica couldn’t resist and went for a slice of the most decadent hot fudge peanut butter pie. Logan didn’t even bat an eye at her choice and that made her giddy for stupid non-explicable reasons.

Once seated and waiting on their food, Veronica decided to go for it, and was definitely not surprised by the “ _I told you so_ ” look, Logan gave her.

She still shrugged at him because come on, she wasn’t going to say anything if he’d even hinted at being annoyed at her coming to see him so out of the blue. _He hadn’t!!_

“Listen, you can say no, I don’t want you to feel obligated or anything, I just…”

“Just tell me Veronica, really,” Logan said then, and it shouldn’t really surprise her how much he really meant that.

She slouched on her seat a little at that, and just looked at him for a beat. Boy, he’d grown well this one. “I have this case,” She began but trailed off when he grinned impossibly wide. She pouted slightly. “Logan,” She whined but he didn’t bite. “Just listen to me, okay? He’s this couple’s counselor —your last step before divorce typa’ guy,”

“You mean kind of like a shrink then?”

“Yeah,” She answered hesitantly a little. “I had one couple coming to me a month or so ago —before the holidays. They complained about everything from how they were ripped off to how his services were crap,” She explained fast trying to cover just about every aspect she could think of before he could get a chance to ask more questions. “Funny thing, she and her husband are back together now, but she claims none of it was because of the therapy they got,”

Logan was confused about just what exactly she was asking from him but he still knew better than to interrupt her now.

“I didn’t want to take the case, but they insisted they weren’t the only ones that had been screwed by this guy, so…you know, I did some digging just to see if what they said made sense, I made some calls, some internet searches here and there, and the guy does sound like a real winner,”

Scum she meant. Logan let out a little breath still waiting for her to throw the punch. Suddenly he kind of knew where this was going.

“How would you feel about booking an appointment?”

“Veronica,” Logan warned before she was even done asking her question.

Suddenly she looked panicked and for one reason or the other Logan’s first instinct was to reassure her —he was not thinking then at all when he reached out across the table and grabbed her hand with his own.

He was not very pleased with his actions at all, but it was too late now to backtrack. His hand was touching hers and she was looking down at them and he couldn’t stop looking at her eyes focused so intendedly in their hands. _Fuck._

She looked up after a beat, deep bright blue eyes staring into his, and he swallowed. _Fuck._

Looked like he’d be seeing a couple’s counselor soon —great, just fan-tas-tic…

x

He picked her up at 1 sharp in front of her apartment building. Veronica had insisted it wasn’t necessary he did, considering they weren’t exactly neighbors these days, but Logan won the debate, and so here he was…5 minutes after 1 pm and she was climbing in his car.

He was dressed casually, and so was she this time —although she had made it a point to accessorize nicely and even throw a bit of makeup and perfume.

Logan was looking at her oddly enough as she adjusted the passenger seat and buckled her seatbelt. “What?” She told him a little too sharply but she just wasn’t liking the way he was looking at her.

His face didn’t change however, and he just shook his head. “This is not a date,” He said then and Veronica couldn’t help feeling confused.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Logan turned his attention to the car, turning it on, and checking for nearby cars and people before he backed up from the parking spot he’d parked.

Veronica was still looking at him expectantly when he quickly glanced her way. He still didn’t speak though.

She did. “Why would you say that?” She asked him more than playfully enough. She was smiling brightly, and her eyes were sparkling in that way that shouldn’t be making Logan nervous in the slightest. “Why would this be a date?” It hadn’t even crossed her mind at all —she really was curious as to why he’d said that.

He was still frowning when he used a hand to somewhat dismiss Veronica’s question. “It’s nothing,” He said simply, backing the car up. “It was just me…you know, picking you up, nothing…”

Veronica was still mockingly smiling at him, but at least now she got where he was coming from. They were quiet for a while as Logan headed to the freeway and put them on their way to meet Veronica’s so called _scum of a shrink_ —her words.

“This is not a date.” She agreed with him when she saw him sort of relaxing behind the wheel. He turned his eyes to look at her quickly. “I would’ve told you if it were,”

She was smirking as she spoke, and Logan couldn’t help matching it. “How long have we been married again?”

They’d met three days ago to go through their whole history —pretend history that was. They kept most of their early childhood years true, just so it wouldn’t be so confusing, they said. They met as kids when he moved to Neptune and eventually started dating in their teens.

They married right before graduating college, and moved to Los Angeles together. They had been married for a little less than three years now, and while things were great at first…Logan was apparently a workaholic who did not know how to communicate in the slightest.

Veronica on the other hand was terribly unhappy since Logan had “ _changed so much since they got married_ ”

They wanted to play Logan as the typical narcissistic, almost abusive, controlling and rather manipulative husband ——Veronica knew he’d never be any of that, but for this case’s sake, she needed him to be.

It was so far away from who he was, that they figured it’d be easier to play it as if he were. After all he’d seen firsthand how all of that looked like growing up with his father. They didn’t say this aloud to each other, but they both thought about it.

Their appointment was at 4:30, giving them just enough time to talk out last minute details to their story.

Logan had been just about to get out of his car so they could head to the damn appointment already, when Veronica stopped him with a hand to his arm.

He looked over at her narrowing his eyes, but Veronica was giving him an innocent smile. “One more thing,” She said as she picked up her small purse and started rummaging through it.

Logan was looking at her expectantly until a couple shiny little rings made their way from her purse. He had an _aha_ moment, while Veronica simply smiled sheepishly at him.

“Just a prop,” She said easily then handing him the ring. “I’m not really proposing,” She added and she almost choked laughing at the face he made. “I just don’t want you getting ideas in that head of yours,” She said as playfully as ever, extending her left hand out for Logan.

Grumpily, he put the damn ring on his finger, and made it a point to glare at her before they both stepped out of the car.

She was smiling so much and such a real smile, that Logan found it hard to actually be mad with her.

Minutes later they were inside the building and promptly were asked to fill some paperwork. Veronica did it all herself as they waited and slowly but surely Logan’s knee began bouncing. The speed increased considerably as the minutes rolled by, but not until he was almost making her own seat shake, Veronica decided to stop him.

Her hand on his knee stopping him in a blink, and the almost teasing smile on her face, got the panicked look off his own. “Just stop,” She told him easily. “We are just playing pretend,” She offered rather offhandedly before considering it a little bit more seriously. “Only we are nailing a sucker to the wall at the same time too,”

Logan’s eyes narrowed, but although he tried he couldn’t help his face softening at that little shrug and smirk Veronica gave him after speaking.

“Fine,” He settled saying grouchily, and she smiled excitedly at that.

She wasn’t even sure why she was so not stressed about this appointment —she hated shrinks, for sport almost, but Logan was here, so it really didn’t feel that awful —not yet anyway.

x

And of course it had taken Veronica more time deciding this wasn’t too awful, for the whole thing to take a pretty awful turn.

After waiting for about twenty minutes or so, both she and Logan were taken to a room to talk with a person who wasn’t the shrink they had their appointment with. Regardless, they were told this was standard procedure, so they just went with it. They were the ones doing most of the talking with this person, which was fine by Veronica. She was putting her more dramatic side to play and was even having a little bit of fun cutting Logan off every time he tried to defend himself a little.

At the end of the “ _meeting_ ” she was even compelled to hug Logan and tell him she was actually sorry for the whole show, but to light up a little…they were just playing.

And yet, and yet…

The instant they walked into the office of the so-called Doctor Tesori, and they introduced themselves, she knew playing time was over.

“James Lovett,” Logan had said, but the face on the asshole Doctor as he took in Logan would forever be stuck in Veronica’s mind.

“There’s no need for that,” He said shaking Logan’s hand. “I know who you are.” Doctor Tesori stated, before letting go of his hand. “I understand your need to keep your privacy, but my staff figured out those weren’t your real names after just one look at Mister Echolls, right here.”

Veronica hated him, she decided right away. He was so damn charming, but she didn’t like him. Not one bit.

She really hadn’t expect them to recognize Logan —he’d been everything but an actual public person these last few years after all, and yet…

She still had a part to play. “Well, you can understand right Doctor?” Veronica said through a fake smile as she took a seat on an awful maroon couch as Tesori was motioning them to do. “Marriage is hard enough as it is, and then you add his name to it…it’s a circus…”

Logan was clearly taken aback and shaken up a bit, she could tell, but with little looks here and there Veronica hoped to ease him a bit.

He sat too, but he was looking absently at one corner in the room, surely hoping against hope he could just disappear from that room.

And of course things only got worse before they got better.

Veronica had been ready to change the card last minutes, she didn’t care, so long as the blame of their fake marriage failing landed on her. She took on playing the just as manipulative, castrating and even blame-aholic wife but it had been too late.

Once Doctor Asshole started talking shit about Logan, no one could stop him.

“From what I’ve gathered from my partners your situation is not as uncommon as you may think it is…” He started. “After all Mister Echolls didn’t have the best example growing up, am I right?”

Veronica turned to Logan as he stared at the doctor, and then nodded. His jaw was set, and his eyes were focused but she knew this was so not what they were expecting of this meeting.

For a moment Veronica thought about calling the whole thing off, but Logan…he was keeping himself in check, just taking everything the Asshole doctor was throwing at him.

“Children of course know only what they are taught. So if a parent mistreats the child, the child thinks he deserves it —as I’m sure is your case mister Echolls,” Doctor Asshole said smiling an awful smile in Logan’s direction. Logan didn’t respond but held his stare. “The first few years of a child's life set the stage for this view of self and thereafter affects his entire life; seeing his entire existence through the eyes of the rejecting, inappropriate, and abusive behavior of others.”

“Doctor Tesori,” Veronica tried to interrupt, but it was as though Doctor Asshole was on a mission to make Logan feel like crap instead of counseling them at all.

“My notes say you’ve never been in therapy as an adult before, is that right?”

Logan nodded at the question, and quickly looked at Veronica shrugging. He was going to keep going with this shit because if anything this was certain proof that this guy was all but professional. “No, I never have.” Logan spoke at last.

Doctor Asshole nodded. “You ever wondered where all your self-esteem issues come from?” He asked not waiting for an answer. “The answer is a quick look at your childhood, and formative years. Trying to feel better about themselves, those individuals like yourself with terribly low self-esteem may become involved in over-spending, alcohol use, perfectionism, drug use, overeating, and sexual promiscuity. These behaviors often then evolve into addictions which as your lovely wife here has mentioned to my partner, are some of the behaviors that landed you two in my office in the first place.” He took a pause to drink from a glass of water, but never stopped staring Logan down. “I’ll be honest with the two of you, there is so much therapy can do for a marriage, but I’m willing to put in the work and the hours if you are too,” He was merely looking at Logan now. “Your problems aren’t going to solve themselves but if you ever wish to have a healthy relationship, a real marriage, then I suggest we start soon.” He said as charming and confidently as ever. “As for you,” He said then, shifting his eyes to Veronica. “I bet your tries to work with Mister Echolls have been very worthwhile, but with such a damaged person, there is also so much a woman alone can do.” He said and by then Veronica was ready to strangle him. “Thank God you guys have no children, that would be such a catastrophe on top of everything else—”

Cutting him off, Veronica stood up at those words, and waved her hands before her. “Okay, let me stop you right here,” She said strongly, moving just a few inches closer to where the Asshole Doctor was sitting. “You don’t know _anything_ about Logan or his family, so just…you know what…just, just shut the fuck up please,” She said because holy shit, she couldn’t help herself any longer. “It was a mistake coming here in the first place, you…you have no idea what you are saying, so…we are just gonna take our business elsewhere,”

“Denial is a dangerous thing Missus Echolls,”

Veronica sucked in a breath and clenched her fists trying like hell not to punch that guy right there and there. “Didn’t I ask you to stop? Keep up,” She spat at the doctor before turning to Logan. “Let’s go,” She told him in a soft whisper surprising him. “Come on,” She said offering him her hand which Logan didn’t take for more than a moment.

Once he did though, he was on his feet and on his way to the door as fast as he could —Veronica’s hand in his.

Doctor Asshole shouted something about knowing they’d be back soon enough, and that their invoice would be emailed to them in the next three days.

The two of them moved without looking back at anything or anyone in their path to the exit though. Veronica felt like crap, more so when as soon as they stepped out of the building, Logan dropped her hand as he raced to his car.

She was breathing fast and her heart was beating too hard also as she reached the car. Logan was already hopping in, yet his hands were squeezing the steering wheel and his head was down as Veronica hopped in after him.

“Logan,” She called his name not knowing what the hell to tell him now. _I’m sorry_ for some reason didn’t feel like nearly enough right now.

He didn’t look up for the longest time then, so Veronica tried again —this time actually trying an apology —the first of a hundred she was sure. “Logan, I’m so sorry, I…God, I didn’t—”

He turned to her at last, and while his face was still stern and serious, his eyes became soft when they met hers. “Can we please, just…not do this?” He asked her desolately. “Not right now,”

Veronica nodded right away because after a day like today she owed him whatever he wanted —even if that was silence and pretty much the last thing she wanted to give him right now. “Okay,” She said back simply and Logan nodded.

It took him another few minutes to calm himself enough to start the car, but eventually he did.

The car ride was awfully quiet; Veronica didn’t even ask him where he was driving them, she just rode along in silence, every so often looking from her window to Logan. He was breathing deeply as he drove, blinking slowly whenever they stopped at a traffic light but never really looking her way.

The first time he seemed to acknowledge she was still with him, it seemed to surprise him, but he recovered quickly and threw her way the saddest smile Veronica had seem from him —in ages.

“Crepes anyone?”

Wait what? The car was stopped now, and they’ve parked in an underground garage somewhere close to a marina. Veronica was not sure she heard him right, so she shook her head and narrowed her eyes looking over at him. “What? What did you say?”

Logan shrugged his shoulders, taking the key off the ignition. “Crepes —ya know, thin pancakes made of some type of flour-y batter. If I recall correctly you are partial to the sweet type preferably with some kind of berry and — _or_ Nutella? I happen to have both…” He said easily then but Veronica was still looking at him as if he’d grown a third head —probably even a fourth. He sighed. “I can take you home if you want to instead—”

“No!” She answered quickly before Logan had even finished talking. 

He smirked mechanically and looked back at her expectedly. “So…crepes?”

“Yeah, sure, yeah,” She mumbled, and while he was still _sort_ of smiling, she was not —she was just looking at him while at the same time wondering how she was going to get it into his head how sorry she truly was about this.

Of course Veronica had no time to voice any of this before Logan was nodding at her quickly and extracting himself from the car. She waited a beat, two…a few before she followed suit.

This was the first time she had been to his apartment; she knew where it was, but this was the first time she was actually seeing his place —his home.

And she liked it.

It was an eight floor, spacious yet not too big that she thought she could get lost in it. It had very large windows everywhere —Veronica of course found it she loved those and all the light coming in the best.

It was a beautiful day which wasn’t surprising for LA, but she still found herself relaxing if only a little as he let her in. Logan went straight to the small living area —he shrugged off his jacket and kicked off his shoes. It was then when he chose to look over at Veronica. “Well, this is where I live.” He said and it was not until he spoke that Veronica noted that she’d stayed still by the entrance hallway. “You staying there?”

She shook her head at his words, but didn’t have a chance to answer Logan before a rather small, light brown dog came running at full speed in her direction.

“Oh who is this?” She was almost gushing, knelt on the floor, immediately petting the stray dog Logan adopted a few months ago. “Hi beautiful!”

“Dude,”

Veronica heard Logan’s voice and same as the dog, she looked up at him. “What?”

“Dude,” He repeated simply.

Veronica tilted her head looking back and forth from Logan and the dog for a moment. “That’s her name?”

Logan simply nodded making Veronica shake her head. Smiling goofily she looked back up at him after a moment. “She’s adorable,”

Logan was smiling down at her now, and he kept her eyes on her for all of ten seconds before he just _had_ to look away and _move_ from her immediate space. He cleared his throat. “You want a drink?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever you are having,” Veronica mumbled while still petting his dog. It was a tiny thing his dog, too little even for a dog of hers she thought, but she still loved the thing at first sight. Especially since the dog happened to like her so much too. The little thing was waving her little tail excitedly and jumping all about her as if she hadn’t seen another human other than Logan in years.

Less than five minutes later, Veronica had moved to sit on his very expensive looking couch with his little pup still playing around her like crazy.

Dude was a mix; some kind of terrier mixed with another small breed dog Veronica guessed. She was so happy and playful Veronica couldn’t help loving the thing immediately.

Logan handed her some wine, and Veronica took it but wasn’t drinking much instead paying most of her attention to the puppy.

Once Logan sat opposite her, Veronica shifted her attention from the Dog momentarily. “I like her,” She stated simply, and the smile Logan gave her then felt so good she could hardly explain it.

She knew they still had to talk about today and that stupid stupid session with that asshole of a shrink, but for now it was kind of nice to just unwind and talk about his dog.

“I thought she was a boy for the longest time,”

But of course at that Veronica gave him the oddest look. Logan laughed softly looking at the puppy waving that tail of hers like crazy around Veronica. “Don’t give me that look…it’s not as if I actually had pets growing up like you did, so stop that look,” He told her pointedly. “ _Dude_ stuck, I don’t think she minds honestly,”

Veronica was still petting Dude’s soft little head as he spoke, but she paused long enough to smile up at Logan. “I like it actually,” She admitted sincerely. “How long have you had her?”

Logan made a face thinking, while half looking at Dude. “About six months maybe…she still hates going outside, so ya know, she doesn’t get to see a whole lot of new people…” He paused then, looking at Dude. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen her that happy with someone other than me,” He shared then not thinking much. “I’m not sure I like it,” He added, and at that Veronica had to laugh.

After setting her glass of wine on the low table before them, she smirked at Logan before picking up the small dog and setting her on her lap. Immediately Dude went even crazier than before trying to _kiss_ Veronica in just about every spot she could find.

“I think I win,” Veronica stated then after a moment. “She definitely likes me better than you,”

Logan rolled his eyes but he was not a little bit annoyed.

x

True to his word, Logan provided Veronica with very damn decent crepes. He gave her a choice again before heading to the kitchen, but she was still so taken by everything she agreed to whatever he wanted. So sweet crepes he made, and sweet crepes she enjoyed and had doubles, and even joked if he could pack her some to take home.

She’d been about two hours or so in his home now, he’d needed the restroom, so with his little dog still attached to her, Veronica got up and grabbed her purse and laptop case.

By the time Logan came back, she was on his couch, shoeless, feet up, laptop on her lap, and Dude happily set by her feet.

Took Logan longer than a moment to react, so Veronica helped him speaking first. “Your place is nice,” She said playfully, winking as he took in just how at home Veronica had made herself.

He should so totally mind, no?

But he didn’t.

At all. “S’alright,”

“It is nice,” Veronica said as she typed away on her computer for a minute before looking back up at him. “I'm not really leaving until we talk about today,”

Logan sighed immediately at those words —but really, did he think he was getting out of that conversation?

“Okay, so maybe it’s selfish on my part. I know you’d rather never touch the subject again, but I…I can’t. I have to be selfish and you have to let me apologize,” She said quickly without really thinking what she was saying.

Logan was pointedly staring into her eyes as she finished saying that.

She bit her lower lip a little. “Okay, okay, you don’t _have_ to let me apologize…but…you know, it’d be _nice_ if you did…”

Veronica was tilting her head as she said that, plus giving him that adorably innocent look on her face, and all Logan could honestly do was groan weakly as he set on the couch opposite her again.

He leaned his head back, and used his hands to cover his eyes and massage his temple.

Veronica looked at him uneasy for about ten seconds before looking back down at her computer.

"If it makes you feel better, this guy's practice _is_ off —and I'm not just talking about his methods of crap…”

Those few words were enough to get her his attention.

“Doctor Asshole said we’d be getting our invoice in about three days, but surprise, I got it already…” She said as Logan slowly uncovered his eyes, and was now looking at her. "A bunch of the other clients seem to have been billed twice or more than that. And at first I thought maybe they weren’t reading the fine print right, or something, but after today, I think Doctor Asshole’s practice is at fault,” Logan couldn’t help the little smile on his face at her choice of words, and Veronica herself couldn’t help patting herself on the back for the little win.

“Apparently that first person who talked to us isn't actually part of their staff. He's outsourced from…" She trailed off then looking at her computer. "UCLA Medical center…Now, I made sure to double check with just about everyone we talked how everything we did today was covered with what we payed. I couldn’t really get them to list down what everything was on paper though, but I do have more than enough audio of a bunch of their staff listing their services covered, and yet…” She paused then for effect, and just to quickly meet Logan’s eyes. “Yet, this invoice says loud and clear Doctor Asshole’s minion of evil number one is gonna cost us at least 1k more…sweet huh? I'm gonna go ahead and say in a few weeks I'll get a bill from UCLA charging me with all their outsourced goods I didn't know I was getting…”

Logan mentally processed all of what she said, before shrugging and looking unimpressed. “Okay , so…”

“So a lot Logan!” Veronica cried back, almost pouting. “So today wasn't a complete waste. I have recordings. I have a lot more evidence than these people who came to my office had before. If they want to lay a case against that shithead of a doctor, they may actually be able to get somewhere now.” Logan still didn’t look too sure, but Veronica knew it wasn’t about the case per se that he was thinking.

It was about everything that Asshole shrink had dared telling him. “Logan.” She called softly after a moment.

She shifted on the couch then, carefully removing her legs from under Dude, just so she could properly face Logan.

Logan didn’t speak then right away —he couldn’t even properly look at her for a few moments. Eventually his face lifted up, and with sad eyes he met Veronica’s. “Listen, I just…you don’t have to apologize, okay Veronica? Most of what he said wasn’t a lie. We both know that.”

“Hey no, stop that,” Her voice came sharp, and determined. He could say and think whatever he wanted about lots of things, but certainly not this.

Logan kept on talking in spite of her anyway. “No, I mean…it’s —” He was about to say that it was okay, but… “No it’s not okay but…you can't lie to my face and tell me more than half the things he said aren't true, no?”

“No.”

“Veronica,” Logan laughed a little weakly at that, but it was not humorous. “Come on,”

“No,” She replied just as strongly as before —Logan was most certainly not talking her into believing half a word of what that asshole said. “You are _none_ of those stupid swanky words he said to make himself look smart. _At all_. That guy doesn't know you _. I do,_ and you are none of what he said.”

Logan couldn’t help looking surprised at those words.

Veronica groaned and rolled her eyes. “Well of course you don't know this —I've never told you any of it —mostly because we haven’t seen each other in ages, but also because I’m an asshole too,” She admitted feeling more than a little annoyed at herself. “But you know what I think? I think you are a good man —You are,” She insisted then when he gave her a look. "Oh come on, you are freaking annoying half the time, but you are not a bad man…or a bad person. You make bad decisions—”

And at that he of course scoffed interrupting her train of words.

She glared at him. “You do make bad choices sometimes, but that doesn’t make you special. We all make awful decisions at one point or the other,” She stressed pointedly, because so help her if Logan didn’t trust her on this one. “And anyway, it’s not as if your default is to always screw up,” Again his eyebrows shot up at her words, and he was giving her a face. “It’s not! You are gonna have to trust me on that one,” She swallowed, pausing her diatribe for a moment. She hadn’t been looking at his eyes directly all this time, but right now she felt like she had to, so she shifted her eyes up.

“I believe there was a compliment somewhere in there for me, huh?” He said snarkily, but she ignored him.

She gave herself a moment then taking a breath and then she began again. “You agreed to go see that awful shrink _just_ because I asked you. _Just like that_. You've been nothing short of wonderful to me since we met that day, while me…Well, I've been an  _asshole_. Capital letters Logan, I've been…rude and stupid when the truth is, it was  _really_  nice to see  _you_  that day —and every day I’ve seen you, since." She breathed out deeply and after swallowing, she managed the nerve to move a little bit closer to him. They might be broken — _still, both_ of them, but that didn’t mean that shrink was even one tiny bit right about Logan. "You are not your childhood traumas —they are part of you but…they are _not you…”_

He didn’t really know what to say back to all that, so he just looked at her for a minute or two. Then he sighed. "Ditto,"

" _Thanks_ ," She answered quickly, still riled up from that speech she threw at him. Then she flattened and let out a breath. "I'm sorry I dragged you to that stupid session with that stupid guy, Logan."

"S'alright," He answered shrugging. He could tell she was not all the way done though. She was looking down right now, wallowing and feeling sorry for herself most likely.

Logan couldn’t quite help the soft smile that formed then on his face. He was not thinking then when he moved to sit on the same couch as Veronica. He looked down at her, and with his thumb tilted her chin upward. “It’s okay, Veronica,”

“I know it is,” And really, that was exactly what she still didn’t understand. Just how Logan could _still_ be so open and forgiving. How he could just lay his very whole heart out for her as if she’d done nothing to him, while in truth, she was not nearly as innocent as he made her feel. He loved _so much_ it fucking scared her, but in a way also gave her a bit of hope…or, _something._ They were both experts on trauma; they’ve seen and gone through just about everything, and yet, while her instincts were to run away and shut the whole world out, Logan’s instincts were always her opposite. She wondered right then just how he did it. She wondered if one day building up walls would stop being her go-to coping tool…

She wondered if one day she would find a way to detach herself from her fight-or-flight reaction.

“Veronica,”

“Yeah?” Her chin was up now, but her eyes were still downcast.

“I’ll gladly back you up with your weird cases in the future, I’ll even lend you Dude if you are that needy, but…you are never to drag me again to see a fucking shrink…”

And there he was, and Veronica felt both as if she wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.

Her eyes shifted up staring into his in seconds, and she lifted her hands, cupping his face. She didn’t know what to tell him though, so she bit on her lip instead and just looked over at his eyes.

Logan seemed to be at the very same loss of words as she was, so for a few seconds they were just staring.

But then the _need_ to kiss her almost clouded his vision so Logan looked away. He honestly didn’t want to ruin whatever it was they had right now, so Logan decided it was better to shift gears.

Veronica narrowed her eyes slightly but before he could move too far, she stopped him with her hands. She couldn't be _that_ wrong right? —this could not be as one sided as she feared it was right that second.

“Logan,”

“Yeah?” He answered still not quite looking at her.

She rolled her eyes and shifted one of her hands to slap him on the head.

“Hey!” He called, and she laughed because what the hell were they doing?

“Are you going to kiss me or…am I gonna walk out that door right now… _with your dog_?” She tried warningly, but it didn’t quite come out as strongly as she hoped it would.

Logan still looked surprised, but not in a bad way.

Veronica was carefully looking at him, as slowly that smirk made its way to his face, and she knew, _finally for sure_ she knew they were on the same page. She felt like she was about to squeal, but also somehow felt stupid because really? Running away with his dog?

But then finally, before she could overthink this or that anymore, Logan grabbed her face with his own palms and kissed her with that passion and fervor he’d wanted to kiss her with ever since he saw her outside that restaurant a few weeks ago.

When she began laughing, Logan broke the kiss to look at her. “Jesus Christ Veronica,” His voice came raspy and breathless, but she looked so beautiful and happy just catching her breath and wrapping her arms around him, he couldn’t make himself mind.

“I don’t know what this is, I don’t know what we are doing, but…”

“What?” Logan pleaded urgently when she just trailed off.

Veronica shrugged innocently before stealing a small kiss, and then meeting his eyes. “But I wanna do it as opposed to, you know…not do it…”

Logan was the one laughing now, but it didn’t take long for Veronica to join.

“You can keep the Dude,” She laughed again as Logan went to kiss her yet again. He couldn’t help laughing too, and pushed back just enough to catch her eyes after a moment. “What?”

“I get to keep _you_ too, right?”

And at those words she smiled, and nodded. “Yeah,” She answered before swallowing because this was crazy and impulsive, but also big. Screwing it up this time wasn’t an option. Going on more years missing this idiot wasn’t an option so right then and there she was choosing to make it work.

“Hey,” Veronica called playfully a beat or so later.

Logan looked up at her to catch her smirking. He’d bite. “What?”

She was biting her lips now, and Logan knew this was going to be good. “I never did get the tour, you know?”

“Tour?”

“Yup,” Veronica nodded mocking seriousness. “This is a wonderful living area,” She said looking goofily about the room. “But, how do I even know there’s, ya know, a bed, an actual factual bedroom with a bed in this joint?”

Veronica wasn’t even all the way finished asking her question, when Logan rose from the couch, and quickly picked her up with him.

She squealed, and laughed as Logan carried her hastily in the direction of what she hoped was the bedroom. He secured her in his arms safely, and suddenly she couldn’t wait and started kissing just every bit of exposed skin she could find.

Logan was on that same boat, she knew, just wanting to feel her as close to him as he could already. Once in the bedroom though, he still made a point to look into her eyes strongly and pointedly for a whole moment. “We’re doing this?”

His voice came shaky, soft, barely there…and yet she knew just about everything he was asking her, and the wonderful thing, the answer to all of it came to her quickly and with unexpected certainty. “ _Yeah_ ,”

The breath Logan let out then was of pure and utter relief. “About damn time,”

_x fin x_

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for Nicole aka Kiki aka Starlightafterastorm at Tumblr for the VERONICA MARS HOLIDAY GIFT EXCHANGE 2015 :) I hope you liked this and that your holidays have been wonderful! I tried throwing in here some of your prompts so hopefully you'll find a few things to like! I definitely got carried away writing this, so I'm sorry a bit about that!  
> All in all, Merry *late* Christmas, and a HAPPY HAPPY 2016 to you! :)
> 
> ExellentlyEllen was a rockstar again this year, and read through this monster one-shot for me -thank you so much to you again!


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